Does My Child Have ADHD? The Signs, the Diagnosis, and Why Sport Matters So Much

In short: a child who goes round and round the house all day, far more than other children his age, needs a doctor, not a guess. If the doctor confirms ADHD, tell your child plainly that it isn’t an illness to be ashamed of: he has extra energy. Then give that energy somewhere to go. Take the medicine the doctor prescribes, and add sport, sport, and more sport.

Lively child, or ADHD?

All children move. All children get distracted. Official guidance says: “Many children struggle to pay attention and are restless some of the time,” and “This does not necessarily mean they have ADHD” (NHS Healthier Together).

The difference is how much, how often, and where. The same guidance describes three groups of signs:

• “Problems paying attention (inattentive)”: “easily distracted, for example a door banging.”
• “Problems sitting still (hyperactivity)”: “full of energy, always on the go.”
• “Problems controlling impulses (impulsivity)”: they “do things without thinking.”

A lively child calms down when the game ends. A child with ADHD often can’t, even when he wants to. A lively child sits through a meal he enjoys. A child with ADHD is up and down from the table even then.

How diagnosis works

Don’t diagnose your child from a list on the internet, including this one. Take him to the doctor. The guidance says: “Your child’s health visitor, school or GP can refer your child for an assessment.”

Two rules from the guidance help parents understand what the specialist is looking for:

• “Symptoms should be present for at least 6 months.”
• “Symptoms must be seen in at least 2 places, such as at home, school, clubs or in childcare settings.”

So before the appointment, write down what you see for a few weeks, and ask his teacher what they see. The diagnosis “is made by recognising patterns of behavior, observing your child.” Your notes are part of that picture. Hearing and other problems are usually checked first.

After the diagnosis: what to tell your child

This is where many families go wrong. The child hears the word, sees worried faces, and decides something is broken in him.

Say it simply:

“This isn’t something to be ashamed of. You have more energy than most people, and a brain that moves fast. We’re going to learn how to use it.”

The guidance calls ADHD “a neurodevelopmental condition”: a difference in how the brain develops. It isn’t laziness, and it isn’t bad behavior on purpose. It also doesn’t go away by being shouted at.

Medicine

Take the medicine the doctor prescribes, the way they prescribe it. Many families find it helps a great deal: the child can finally sit, focus, and feel the success he’s been missing.

Don’t stop it, change the dose, or give extra on a hard day without asking the doctor. Ask every question you have at the appointment, and tell the doctor about any side effects.

Medicine helps. But in my view it works best with something else beside it.

Sport, then sport, then sport

All that energy has to go somewhere. If it doesn’t go into a field, a pool or a mat, it goes into the sofa, the walls and his brothers and sisters.

The guidance says: “Offer a balanced diet and encourage regular exercise.” I would put it more strongly. For a child with ADHD, sport is one of the best daily helps there is.

• Try many. Football, swimming, martial arts, running, gymnastics, cycling. Let him try one for a few weeks, then another, until he finds the one he loves.
• Clear rules help. Sports with a coach, a structure and a clear goal often suit these children well.
• Every day if you can. Even half an hour of running in the park before homework changes the evening.
• Don’t take sport away as a punishment. It’s part of the treatment, not a reward.

If he drops every sport after two weeks, see My Teen Quits Every Hobby After Two Weeks.

At home

From the same guidance:

• “Encourage good sleeping habits.”
• “Use a 1 sentence rule for instructions.”
• “If you think an activity is going to be demanding, be proactive and build in short breaks.”
• “Routines help children focus on one thing at a time.”

More on daily life: Why Does My ADHD Child Forget What I Just Said?, ADHD Homework Paralysis: Helping Without Doing It for Them, and for girls, who are often missed, ADHD in Teenage Girls: Why It Is Missed.

---

Next step

For the next three weeks, note what you see at home and ask the school what they see. Book the doctor. And this week, sign him up to try one sport. Remind once → Homework plan → After-school plan →

Where you live: some guidance quoted here is from the UK's health service. A "GP" is your family doctor, and 111 and 999 are UK numbers. Use your own doctor, health line and emergency number.