Topic
The two of you
Blame, silence, disagreeing about discipline, and what the children see.
Articles
- Arguing in Front of Kids: Why How It Ends Matters MostChildren may be affected less by the fact that parents argue than by how the argument ends. What research suggests about conflict, repair, and what children see.
- Disagreeing About Discipline in Front of the KidsOne parent is strict, the other is soft. Questions and answers on disagreeing about discipline: why couples differ, what children learn when parents argue in front of them, and how to settle it in a closed room and come out as a team.
- Disrespectful Teenager: Eye Rolls, Tone and Slammed DoorsThe sigh, the eye roll, the slammed door. Where ordinary teenage attitude ends and real disrespect begins, what to say, what to let pass, and how to keep respect without losing your teenager.
- Feeling Like Roommates in Your Marriage After KidsWhen a couple's conversations shrink to schedules, bills and school runs, the distance may grow without anyone noticing. Why couples drift after children, and small ways back toward each other.
- The Four Horsemen in Marriage: Patterns Children LearnThe eye roll, the sneer, the "you always", the wall of silence. Four ways couples hurt each other that children watch and learn, and what to say instead, so your children see a better way to disagree.
- How Parents Arguing Affects Children, Even Behind Closed DoorsYou waited until the children were in bed. But voices carry through walls. What the argument children overhear can leave in them, what research says, and what makes the difference.
- Introducing a New Partner to Your Children After DivorceThinking of bringing a new partner into your children's life after divorce? A checklist for before you choose, the warning signs to watch, and what a stepparent should and should not be to your children.
- Small Acts of Kindness Between Parents That Kids RememberA cup of tea brought without asking. A hand on a shoulder. A "how was your day?" that waits for the answer. Small daily rituals between partners that strengthen a relationship, and that children remember.
- Should Parents Make Up in Front of the Kids? Why Repair MattersChildren often see the fight but never see the repair. Before and after examples of how parents can let children witness the making up, and why research suggests it matters as much as avoiding the fight.
- Marriage After Kids: Why It Gets Harder and What HelpsSomewhere under the school runs and the bills, there are two people who once chose each other. A practical guide to looking after your relationship while raising children, and why it matters for the whole family.
- Parents Who Disagree on Discipline: Finding One PlanOne of you is strict, the other is soft. A letter to two parents who love the same child and see discipline differently, and a way to become one team without becoming one person.
- How Parents' Relationship Shapes Teenagers' Views on LoveTeenagers study their parents' relationship closely. Questions parents ask about what teens learn about love, respect and conflict from home, and what to do if you're not proud of what they've seen.
- How Parents' Respect for Each Other Teaches Children RespectChildren learn respect less from what we tell them and more from what they see between the adults. Before and after examples of everyday moments between parents, and the lessons children take from them.
- When My Partner Undermines Me in Front of the Kids"Don't listen to your mother." When one parent overrules the other in front of the children, what may be happening, what to say in the moment, and what to say later.
- Preparing for a Baby as a Couple: Who Will Carry What?Many couples prepare the nursery and forget to prepare the week. Why talking about who will carry what, before the birth, may protect the two of you.
- The Silent Treatment Between Parents: What Children LearnNo shouting, no slammed doors. Just two parents who stop speaking to each other for days. What children read in that silence, why it is not peace, and how to break it.
- Staying Connected as a Couple While Raising Young KidsSmall children can leave little room for the two adults who started the family. Eight small rituals that may help a couple stay close in the busiest years, without needing time or money you do not have.
- Staying Together for the Kids: What Matters Most to ChildrenMany parents stay in an unhappy marriage for the children's sake. Common beliefs about staying together or separating, set beside what research suggests matters most to children.
- When Your Partner Stops Talking: What the Silence May MeanWhen the talking stops between two partners, the silence can mean rest, distance or hurt. A reflective look at reading the quiet, and small ways to reach across it without testing each other.
- Touched Out: When You Can't Bear to Be Touched After a Day With the ChildrenAfter a day of being climbed on, held and pulled, many mothers can't bear one more touch, even from their partner. Why it happens, how to explain it without hurting him, and how to get a little of yourself back.
- Why Do I Resent My Partner Since the Baby Came?Since the baby, you find yourself angry at your partner more than you expected: the sleep, the load, the freedom they still seem to have. Where resentment comes from, and the one conversation that starts to take it apart.